The root of all evil

I found this in one of my old journals from high school.

"Wealth cannot bring happiness and appearances can misrepresent reality. I have to remember to not try too hard to be something I'm not. People are defined by more than their bank accounts."

I think teenage me is smarter than adult me.

Magic

"A quality that makes something seem removed from everyday life, especially in a way that gives delight."

Magic has a lot of meanings, as in there are a lot of definitions of the word. I think that says a lot about magic, like it's hard to pin point it and it's kind of comforting to know that the world hasn't been able to define it yet, either. There's a lot of stuff about hoodoo and mojo, but that's not the kind of magic that I'm thinking of. 

Have you ever met someone, and known instantly, that they are meant for your life? That's the kind of magic that I mean. 

Magic is something that has always been a part of my life. A lot of my writing is about/mentions/alludes to magic.

Sometimes I hear a song and I'm like YES, this is exactly what was missing from my life and now it's complete. Magic.

When I realise that I have been breathing without having to think about it. Magic.

I'm pretty sure it was Roald Dahl that said that those who don't believe in magic will never find it. I believe. Everything's magic.

Particularly, his smile. 

P.S, It was! "and above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it." - Roald Dahl

Mirrors

*I was assigned to personify my fear and this what I came up with*

Warning: Reflections in this mirror may be distorted.

Face to face, I start to realise the similarities between us. We don't look a like but we've seen the same things and felt the same feelings. 

She's worn and tired, a suitcase under each of her eyes. Her eyes. They're the same as mine but hers seem brighter, as if she's slowly stealing the light from mine. 

I don't know who she is or what she wants but I won't ever forget the way her mouth twisted into a smile as she spits the words "you're a fucking failure" at me.

You're nothing. 

Nothing you do is good enough. 

You will let us down. 

You will let your mother down.

You will let your friends down.

Do you know why? because you're a fucking failure. Don't forget. 

It's been this way for as long as I can remember. This constant whispering straight into my left side brain. 

I cannot place the blame on her though. It's my fault. She is me, we are you and we are all together and all that fucking shit. 

Fear is my second favourite f-word.